When I was an undergraduate student at Texas Tech, the fall semester of 1981 was not a stellar experience for me. That is actually putting it in very tactful terms. The truth is that Tech placed me on academic probation after the semester was over, so I dropped out of school for a period of time. I went to work fulltime for an AC/Delco auto parts warehouse in Lubbock. It was and still is a family owned business that two of my college friends continue to operate today. I worked in the warehouse pulling orders for the auto parts stores that we supplied in West Texas.

I distinctly remember coming home one night and noticing small holes all over the front of my jeans. This is of course was long before jeans with holes became an expensive and desirable commodity. The culprit was battery acid. In stocking batteries that day, I got just enough acid on my jeans to burn small holes all over them.

I have been told that bitterness works the same way. It burns holes in our hearts like battery acid does on a pair of jeans. Bitterness is indeed corrosive and destructive. I am not sure that we recognize just how damaging bitterness is until the holes have been burned, and the damage to our heart is pretty extensive.

Bitterness…It is the person who has been betrayed by a friend who finds it so hard to trust again. It is the person who grew up in an abusive home, and can’t forgive an offending parent. Bitterness strikes the employee who gets a raw deal at work. It destroys families and sidetracks churches. In my case, bitterness was caused by an inability to trust and love people in a normal and healthy manner. I felt abandoned and scared after the death of both of my parents. I therefore found it difficult to relate to members of our extended family.

I let bitterness corrode my heart for a long time. I finally figured out several years ago that it is an aggressive acid that will eat way at every important relationship in our life, if we let it. What are we supposed to do, if that is true? I learned to respect the presence of battery acid when I worked in the warehouse, and so I did not destroy any more jeans. Years later I figured out that the acidic presence of bitterness had to be acknowledged and dealt with aggressively as well. That opportunity for me came in the form of a dream.

I had a dream about one of the individuals I felt bitter toward. In the dream this person was giving me a good verbal ripping! She was tearing me up good. I told her, in the dream that the rest of her family needed to hear this tongue lashing that I was getting. What would they think? There was a long period of silence, in the dream…I finally looked up and saw huge tears running down her cheeks. The person I perceived to be an aggressor was hurting, in the dream. I reached out for her, in the dream, and gave her a hug. And then I woke up…

Something very interesting took place after that dream. The bitterness started to vanish. It is almost as if I threw away the holey jeans after that event. My heart had been touched.

Bitterness causes us to see other human beings in a distorted light. It destroys our ability to think rationally and accept people, shortcomings and all. It distorts our ability be empathetic. It is just corrosive. Something has to stop that insidious process. In my case, divine intervention came in the form of a dream.

I broke the deafening silence that had been triggered by bitterness by writing a five page handwritten letter to those whom I felt bitter toward. My penmanship is horrendous, so it took several hours. I should also point out that once bitterness is eradicated from our hearts, we have the capability of being honest again. I was able to be honest in the letter. I was able to openly admit the laundry list of relational offenses that I had committed. I was able to ask for forgiveness.

The letter was received with open and welcoming hearts. Five years of silence was finally broken. A warm invitation was extended to me by those whom I now felt renewed love toward. It was invited to a physical reconciliation. It was a sweet and emotionally charged reunion. I was too nervous to shed a tear, so I waited until the drive home. Then I shed enough tears to irrigate the Majave Desert. The process of healing all of the holes that had eaten through in several hearts began.

I am pretty careful when I deal with batteries today. I know what that kind of acid is capable of doing. I am equally careful with interpersonal relationships. I also know what the acidic nature of bitterness is capable of doing. And I know now that dreams really do come true…