I have been intrigued by the study of generational differences for a long time. The values and lifestyles of the GI Generation, those who lived through the depression and World War II, are obviously very different from young adults in their 20’s. There is on going dialogue about the generation gulf that separates adults of different ages. I see it in a church setting every week. Young adults in their 20’s and 30’s have a very different set of desires than members of their parents or grandparent’s generations. My mother-in-law is determined to destroy everything I have learned about generational differences. She is a rather interesting person…

My mother-in-law, Barbara, is fully capable of befriending a rattlesnake. I have watched her in action for over 26 years. I don’t recall ever hearing a negative word about another human being ever coming out of her mouth. If she is inclined to deride others, I have missed it every time. She consistently reaches out to people in a spirit of compassionate concern. She is oblivious to racial or socioeconomic differences. It just never crossed her mind that generational differences create huge divides between people.

A few weeks ago a young couple moved in the farm house not far from where my in laws live out in the country. Ironically the young couple moved in the very home where my mother-in-law grew up. When I say young couple, I do mean young…He is 18 years old and she is 17. My mother-in-law is 69 years old. Her oldest grandchild is 21. She ignored all generational barriers and welcomed the young girl with a homemade pie and a personal visit.

It is my understanding that a fairly lengthy and meaningful conversation ensued. How does that happen? Barbara is very old school. She has never been on facebook. She only carries a cell phone for an emergency. She does not even subscribe to cable television. She has so little in common with members of the younger generation. But a young 17 year old bride told Barbara that she was looking forward to another visit. She confided that she was lonely and enjoyed having someone to talk with.

I have left out a really important detail out of this narrative. It is a detail that explains a lot. Barbara does not have time to gossip, deride, or otherwise assail another person’s character, because she is an excellent listener. She listens empathetically and consistently. I suspect that the young bride who received the pie probably has a story to tell. I can think I can say with confidence that her story was heard the day the pie was delivered. Generational gaps close in quickly when people care enough to listen.