I should have never gone in alone.  I know better.  When  facing a potentially dangerous situation, it is never good to fly solo.  But I ignored the internal warnings going off in my head, and moved ahead by myself.  It was dark and scary, but too late to turn back. I really should have told the boys to call somone if I am not back in 30 minutes.  Ten minutes into the mission I started wishing I had brought a flashlight.  The discovery of missing treasures made it worth any risk I was about to face.

I found those treasures buried in my closet.  That was my mission this afternoon: Clean out a closet that had not seen any attention since I had put up my stacked heels from the disco era in 1977.  I began the task somewhat fearfully.  My closet light does not work.  I was entering a dark area that could well be inhabited by a family of hideous monsters, who have made their home under a stack of size 32 waist shorts that I have not worn in a few years.  I felt like I was an archeological mission of some kind.  It was scary to think about what lurked in the black crevices.

I have to admit that it was embarrassing to find stacks of clothes that I have not worn in years.  I have two and not one pair of golf shoes!  I have a t-shirt from every camp and special event I have attended since 1987.   My mother’s admonition at the dinnner table about people starving in India ran through my head.  I wondered what a psychologist would say about a 47 year old man with a terribly messy closet.

I really don’t want to know what the psychologist would say.  As I reached for still another pair of shoes that had been listed as missing in action, it occurred to me that the status of my closet maybe more revealing about the condition of my heart than I want to admit.  I am so busy running here and there that I don’t take the time to shed things that need to go.  Stuff starts piling up.  I wondered if the obvious disarray of my closet reveals the scattered nature of my life. I wondered if I am far more over indulgent tnan I want to think?  Really..who should have so many clothes?  I am not pulling these conclusions out of the air.

I have noticed an interesting correlation over a period of time. When a person stops taking care of his home outwardly, it is not uncommon to see that there is a lack of internal upkeep as well.  I know that sounds crazy, but there is some truth to it.  When a person becomes so consumed in things away from home, the yard starts looking shaggy.  The paint on the trim starts to peel and numerous things need to be repaired. Clutter is stacked everyhwere.  But there is little motivation to get the house whipped into shape. Internal stuff is occupying the heart  is one cause of a home to be in a state of clutter or decline. I do think that the presence of so much stuff is indicativeof  a society gone wild with over indulgence on multiple fronts.

It is a New Year.  It is good to have at least one closet cleaned out. I have a few more projects on the horizon… Some of them are of an internal nature and others are external. I am determined not to allow things to stack up that don’t need to accumulate in my closet or my heart this year.

I came back from my mission safely today.  I have a stack of clothes to give away and another stack has gone to the trash.  I even discovered a really nice dress shirt that I may wear this week. It had been held hostage by a pair of worn out shoes that had been hiding it.  In fact I did such a good job, that I may consider hiring out as a closet cleaner.  Of course I will need hazardous duty pay for some of the assignments… Hmm.. A business venture in the making.  But be sure to call somenone if I am not back in thiry minutes!