Make the most of your regrets; never smother your sorrow. But tend and cherish it till it comes to have a separate and integral interest. To regret deeply is to live afresh.  -Henry David Thoreau

To regret deeply is to live afresh. I believe the poet was correct. Regrets are not a life sentence. And being regretful is not the equivalent of unrelenting guilt. What do you regret, as 2021 ends?

My regrets tend to fall into one of two categories. I tend to think quickly on my feet. The training I have received in several disciplines has cultivated that trait. When interpersonal encounters are tense, quick thinking can be an asset. It can also be a colossal liability.

In a flash, my words can wield indescribable destruction. They are often peppered with dark humor or subtle sarcasm. There is a fine line between speaking directly and being insensitive. I am confident that line has been crossed more than once over the course of this year.

Procrastination forms the essence of my second category of regrets. I need to send that person a text. I need call the man who lost his father. I have not heard from ______. I wonder what is going on with them? I really should make a trip to see my friend. The urgent continues to suffocate the important.

As a new year looms, I am going to make the most of my regrets. I plan to live afresh. I believe that will entail living with a greater awareness of the areas that need attention. I will watch my words closer. I will strive to be quick listen and slow to speak. I will practice the discipline of acting on the nudges I feel to contact those I care about the most.

What do you regret this year? How can you make the most of your regrets?