Make the most of your regrets; never smother your sorrow. But tend and cherish it till it comes to have a separate and integral interest. To regret deeply is to live afresh. -Henry David Thoreau To regret deeply is to live afresh. I believe the poet was correct. Regrets are not a life sentence. And being regretful is not the equivalent of unrelenting guilt. What do you regret, as 2021 ends? My regrets tend to fall into one of two…
I woke up this morning in a Christmas funk. The holidays bring sad thoughts to the surface. Loss has been a theme of 2021. I lost friends this year. I officiated at 25 funerals during 2021. On January 1st of this year, I responded to a SIDS death with the sheriff’s office. Exactly one week later I responded to another one. It was the shape of things to come. It has been an intense year. I have delivered more death…
I helped a woman giving birth to her first child. Wrapping the infant in a blanket, holding him close so the chilling wind would not do him harm. I waited for the ambulance. Later I stood on the expressway, braced against a cold north wind, as I held a small baby in my arms. There had been a wreck between a small car and an eighteen-wheeler. The mother was holding the child on her lap and was thrown into the…
Are you the parent of a middle school student? Did your child begin 6th or 7th or even 8th grade in August? If you are in that stage of parenting, it’s quite a challenge. You may find that your child no longer wants you to come to the school to eat with them. You may discover that your intelligence has declined significantly. Your sweet child, who once begged for another bedtime story, really does not like you too much right…
What is the worst thing you ever seen? The EMT’s and Paramedics I serve tell me this is a common question. These are people that do not work in the field. I have a hunch they have some sort of dramatized image of the service of EMS personnel conjured up in their head. For some odd reason people feel compelled ask that question. What is worst thing you have ever seen? Can I offer a response for my EMS friends?…
Note: I have been a law enforcement chaplain since 1990. The scenarios I describe here are based on nearly 32 years of hands on experience. My youngest son told me years ago that Facebook is for old people. In fact, I think even went so far to say that the old people are ruining Facebook. He was about seventeen when made such an observation. At 25, I am sure he has a renewed appreciation for old people like his dad….
It has now been 30 years. In 1991, my mother was diagnosed with advanced stage IV colon cancer. I was 29 years old. By the time she received such a diagnosis, the physicians recommended hospice care as soon as she was released from the hospital. My sister and her husband graciously opened their home for that important endeavor even though they had a ten-year-old and a 3-year-old running around! I started making weekly trips from Wichita Falls to Lubbock immediately. …
I am a self-admitted book nerd. I read regularly for professional development. I am reading biographies of actors and actresses from the 1940’s. And I am enjoying some fiction in audio book format. In Carey Nieuwhof’s book, Didn’t See It Coming: Overcoming 7 Gradual Changes That No Expects and Everyone Experiences, the following observations are made: The change you don’t implement often becomes something none of us wants-regret. For the sake of the next generation, for the sake of contributing…
Dear Julien, You are fortunate. You have a mother and dad who love you. In this crazy world, that is nothing to be taken for granted. By the time you read this letter, you will have had the opportunity to be frustrated with both of your parents. No worries. That is quite normal. There are a few things you need to know about your mother. Your mother is exceptionally bright. She has a sharp intellect that will help you in…
Everyone told me. I heard the same message. Holding your newborn grandson will be like nothing you have ever experienced. One friend told me I would feel emotions that I did not know existed. They were correct. It is one of those things you will never forget. But there was a surprise in the mix. Watching my son be a dad left my speechless. He is assuming his paternal role with such grace and patience. He expertly comforts his son,…